[2009.07.09] SEVEN LITTLE FORTUNES 50TH ANNIVERSARY: YUEN BIAO SPLASHED THE STAGE, YUEN MAN WENT AS HE WENT

If he can bear to do this, what may he not bear to do? Seven Little Fortunes back then although were young in age already performed on stage. Yet ultimately children had limited tolerance. When they had to go, even better acting would lose to biological needs. As the saying goes "spilled water is hard to retrieve". What to do after they relieved themselves was a demonstration of Seven Little Fortunes' on stage wisdom.

Too Hard To Hold, Silent Trickle

According to Yuen Ju, back then Yuen Biao made a puddle on the Lai Chi Kok Amusement Park stage. Yuen Ju says, "Yuen Biao was very little at the time. That time he played an eunuch. He only needed to stand in the back, without any dialogue or special stunt. I stood next to him to play the palace maiden. Suddenly Yuen Biao whispered, 'Sister, I really have to go!' At the time the act still had ways to go, even if he had to go he could not do so. So I told him, 'No, right now you can't go' Yet Yuen Biao said, 'I have to urinate' I told him to hold it in. Soon after he already wet himself."

Yuen Biao immediately defended himself, "Sister, at the time I was only six or seven! For the lack of better words, I really could barely walk when I had to perform on stage. However that time I was standing in the back, coincidentally the pants were dark. No one would notice it even when it was wet. The audience had no idea. However most importantly even the Master didn't know, if not it would have been another beating." O divine art of subtlety and secrecy! Through you we learn to be invisible, through you inaudible. Obviously he wet his pants, he still pretended all was well. Was this not the spirit of Sun Tzu's ANCIENT ART OF WAR?

Yet Yuen Biao's stand up going while acting was not considered classic. Even more classic was the all purpose honor student Yuen Man's "going on the go". Yuen Ju recalls, "Yuen Man that time had to do table laps. When you walked around the table, everyone off stage was staring at you. Yet Yuen Man's walk that time was strange. After he finished why would there be an extra circle on the ground? Actually he had to go so bad that he went as he went. Yuen Man, you are amazing!"

Audacity Of Absence

Aside from turning the stage into a carefree nature's call, the group of mischievous Seven Little Fortunes even played hooky. Yuen Biao remembers that period of audacity and says, "At the time before the opening, we didn't want to go back to theater six for make up and dressing to prepare for the show. Either we went to the other theaters to watch performances or we went on the mechanical rides. Once some brothers truly vanished. Then they had to rely on other brothers to take the fall and perform a few more laps, change costumes and make up a few more times to cover their parts. They would rather work harder than letting the Master know." (23)